Grit: Discovering Our Mental Toughness

While ascending the never-ending sequence of climbs in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains last month, I wasn’t thinking about grit. I was purely determined to pedal my way to the crest of each hill and be that much closer to my destination: the next college on our itinerary. Cycling with six college guidance counselor colleagues in Virginia, I spent the week traveling from school to school on a bike fully loaded with the clothes and supplies I would need for the week. We college-bound road warriors biked 360 miles in six days, but one day in particular truly tested our stamina as we cycled 81 miles and climbed nearly 7,000 feet.  I will not lie. When we arrived at our Lynchburg College destination just before sunset, I was done, sure I would not have been able to complete one more rotation of my pedals if my life depended on it. In retrospect, I see that grit got me there. It allowed me to keep going, even when I was exhausted, parched and had no idea what ascents might lie ahead.

Merriam-Webster defines grit as mental toughness and courage, but I also like the Wikipedia definition: perseverance and passion for long-term goals.  Time horizon matters, as grit demands the drive to follow through even when the rewards are not easily within our sight or grasp.

As we begin another application season, I often ask students about their motivation. I want to know the things that excite them, their aspirations and goals, and how they hope to achieve them.  Where does college fit into these plans? Though I firmly believe that 17 year olds need not have everything figured out, I am curious about what inspires them to persevere, even when the path isn’t clear or the challenges seem insurmountable.  How and when are they mentally tough because they are driven by something that requires focus and effort, even when rewards don’t come easy, contrary to the short-term pleasure of immediate gratification?

While some people are naturally driven, I don’t believe one is necessarily born with grit. It develops over time as we find a purpose or an interest that engages us to persevere over the long-term.  Some kids find their passion early, whether it is discovering an artistic talent, a natural athletic ability or an academic curiosity.  But having an interest is only the start.  What keeps us going, drives us to delve more deeply and fuels our desire to set and work towards a challenging goal is an understanding for how grit feeds our soul. Rarely does this happen when the goal is within our grasp and comes too easily.  More often we develop grit and find our motivation when we take a risk, push ourselves, occasionally fall short but regain our mental and physical toughness to overcome the inevitable obstacles.  Only then can we see the true rewards from the toughness, courage and perseverance that got us there.  

Though I have enjoyed cycling on and off since the age of six, my infatuation with biking was kindled through a discovery of my love for colleges. It had been 30 years since I last owned a road bike, but I was determined to reacquaint myself with the sport and get myself into cycling shape to join and keep up with a group of counselor cyclists who found a way to combine these seemingly unrelated interests.  What I discovered on that hot July day somewhere around mile 70 when I was thirsty, weary and battling possible defeat at the sight of each new hill is that it wasn’t just about getting to the next college; it was about getting to the top of the mountain without giving up.   

What is the Value of a Liberal Arts Education?

Is a liberal arts education a luxury? With more than half of all undergraduates now choosing more “practical” majors such as business, nursing and engineering, it appears that many young people and their families are questioning the value of a liberal arts education. The question on parents’ and students’ minds today, especially given the escalating cost of a college education and the state of the economy, is will my son or daughter (or I) be employable?

This week the Chronicle of Higher Education is running a series of articles which examine what it titles ‘The New Liberal Arts.” The special report explores the question of value, and also cites the changes in college curriculum in responses to the shifting demand. Many traditional liberal arts institutions have added pre-professional programs. At the same time, several colleges with a more career-oriented focus are incorporating a liberal arts approach, placing greater emphasis on critical thinking and intellectual exploration. The idea is to help students develop important analytical and problem solving skills in addition to preparing them for a profession.

Returning to the question about the value of a liberal arts education, I wanted to share an article from the Chronicle series written by Sanford J. Ungar, the president of Goucher College and former host of National Public Radio’s “All Things Considered.” His article, “7 Major Misconceptions About the Liberal Arts,” seeks to dispel the myths that a liberal arts degree isn’t worth the cost, especially when compared to pre-professional training. Ungar’s article can be accessed through the link http://chronicle.com/article/7-Major-Misperceptions-About/64363/?sid=at&utm_source=at&utm_medium=en. Mr. Ungar makes several compelling arguments, key among them is the notion that students must be prepared for change, especially given the evolving demands of society today. One thing is almost certain: many careers which will be available to the Millennial Generation in their lifetimes do not presently exist. The challenges we face today have created an even greater need for college students to graduate with a broad based education that prepares them to think critically and outside the box.

But how does that factor in the perceptions and expectations of those who make the hiring decisions? Don’t employers want to hire young people who have specialized in a particular field of study, especially in a buyer’s market where unemployment is running at 10%? According to Mr. Ungar, a 2009 survey for the Association of American Colleges and Universities found that 75% of employers nationwide encourage students to seek a liberal arts education. 89% want to see greater emphasis on communications, both orally and written. Analytical reasoning, critical thinking, creativity and the ability to innovate were also cited as important skills required by prospective employers.

One piece of advice I give to those in the midst of a job search, especially anyone who has been employed in a downsized industry: think in terms of your skill set, not your last job description. In our fast paced and changing society industries and jobs will come and go. The value of a liberal arts education will last a lifetime.

Providing Career Guidance - Finding the Balance

How important is it that my child has a career direction before going to college and how can I guide him or her through the career search process? This is a question many parents of high school students ponder. The topic was thoughtfully addressed by journalist Eilene Zimmerman in the New York Times Career Couch column which appeared on October 25, 2009: “Helping Teenagers Find Their Dreams.” You can access it at http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/25/jobs/25career.html. I share Zimmerman’s belief that there is too much pressure on kids today to define themselves by a career before acquiring the tools to choose wisely and prior to gaining exposure to various options that might be right for them.

Students today receive so many messages, both subtle and overt, pressuring them to define their career interests before they are even out of high school. Consider the college application process: The first page on the Common Application is Future Plans! Many colleges want to know intended major as well as possible career or professional plans before they even see the GPA or know where the student graduated from high school! Anxious seniors who were hoping to use the next four years to figure this out come to me in a panic: Is it okay to put “Undecided?” I must confess that I, too, encourage students to put down an academic interest and possible career choice, though emphasize that they should view their college years as a time to broaden horizons and explore new things. The message I try to convey is that it is okay to change one's mind; in fact, it is expected. How can I say otherwise? I am on my third post college career!

In order to help our kids with this self discovery and career search, we can start by alleviating some of the pressure. Instead of projecting our own angst about their futures onto them, we ought to have conversations which begin to generate ideas, but also engage their interest. Talking about likes, dislikes, talents and strengths generally elicits far more enthusiasm and willingness to talk than Mr. Bradshaw’s put-off line in The Graduate: “Ben, what are you doing…? Be open, and try to listen rather than feel compelled to offer up answers.

Here are 5 tips you might consider the next time you find yourself engaged in a career discussion with your teen:

1) Help your child discover skills and interests rather than advise him or her to focus exclusively on career options – skills are transferable; careers come and go
2) Guide, don’t lead – Teens need to take the initiative. This is all about their dreams, not yours.
3) Take the cues and know when to back off; If your teen does not want to engage in this discussion when you want to, it won’t be productive.
4) Assure your children that uncertainty is okay and let them know that you support the need to explore. After all, they are still teens!
5) Accept that much has probably changed since you last embarked on a career search and recognize your own knowledge shortcomings. The career your teen ultimately chooses may not even exist today!